DREAM BIG

Fridays With Friends

As the pressures of life intensify, sometimes the difference between going after a dream and remaining passive is having someone say, ” I believe in you!”  That is what our Fridays with friends group did. We believed in each other! As always, we arrived Friday at 6:00 Lynn in her cozy sweatpants , Jane adorned with a purse that was bigger than her, Sue wearing her favorite pink tank top with one of the Disney character on it and then there was me in my blue jeans and boots.

I always brought dessert, it was my time for experimenting and they were willing to be my Ginny pigs. Lynn always provided the main dish and they were always delicious.  Jane movies and music, and Sue was the master decorator out of the four of us. She always brought scented candles, flowers and what ever else her creative mind came up with. We took turns bringing the drinks sometimes wine some times chocolate milk, it just depended on what we were celebrating.

We had made a rule that we to shed our burdens at the door as we bounced into the kitchen, carrying with us the crisp outside air and our share of the meal.  I put  whipped cream on the strawberry shortcake, Sue decorated the table with flowers and candles, Jane put on some light music, while Lynn warmed up the enchiladas she made and cut up the crusty French bread. The rich aroma of the food cooking filled the kitchen. I decided to propose a toast, “To life’s celebration!” We held our classes of chocolate milk together, waited for the sound of chimes and drank the milk of acceptance. This ritual was to remind us how much we enjoy each other.

  As we enthusiastically ate, I realized it wasn’t just about the food it was about bursts of laughter, some nights were for prayer when one of us was faced with an insurmountable obstacle. There was Lynn’s mother’s heart surgery, Sue’s daughter’s nasty divorce; we had a special dessert the day it was final. And the Fridays rolled by one by one, steadily weaving threads of themselves into our lives, into the fabric of time. After our New Years dinner Lynn always insisted that we toast with champagne and take turns sharing our goals and dreams, toasting the New Year’s many promises. Then we each lived our lives as the months unfolded before us, filled with painful challenges and delightful surprises, as Fridays always came around.

Best Friends Can Stay Connected On Facebook

The first thing in the morning, my best friend is on my mind and as the day goes on her smile is present. I hear her laughter even as though there are no mile between us. And when the day is over I reflect with loving thoughts of her. I especially remember the times we spent talking and laughing while walking along the sea-shore  while freely sharing what was on our minds. Back then it was about our children, husbands, jobs,  and everything from what to cook for dinner to world news. Hows Big Dog doing? or What should I wear to Jennifer’s wedding? 

I think about all the birthdays, Christmas‘s and vacations that our families spent together? Even though we are miles apart when I look at the photos of us together it seems like there are no miles between us and we still have all the time in the world to talk about our future’s, dreams, hopes, and plans. When I go to the movies I find my self wanting to share my pop corn and talk about this past weeks events with her then I remember you are miles away. Now days we are using our senior discounts and sharing the latest accomplishments of our grandchildren.  

 I went  shopping the other day I wanted to ask her opinion about a new set of dishes that I wanted to buy because they reminded me of a crisp  autumn day in Main. I posted a picture of the dishes on face book and she gave me the thumbs up. But it wasn’t the same as when we are face to face. I was thinking that she might forget how much I about her. I don’t want that to happen, so I decided to send her this little reminder on Facebook  . . . I love just being in the same room as you. I enjoy hearing her voice and the sound of  her laughter.

Your happiness means a lot to me, and I am always hoping that  love, kindness, health, and joy will come your way. Nothing can ever change the way I feel about you. Not time or distance, not anything you do or don’t do. Not anything I hear or see. So if you are ever lonely keep this on your Facebook wall and don’t delete it. Read it again and again, and know there’s someone who always cares about you.

Friendship Is Beautiful

Do you think that your best friend is beautiful inside and out? Have you told her lately?  Maybe she’s not  beautiful by the worlds standards but by the standards of what really makes her a beautiful friend to you. Take a few minutes and tell her.  Here are a few reasons that makes our friends beautiful to us.  It is because every time you talk to her she has a smile on her face and never a scowling look.

Is it because she is sensitive to your needs and treats you with kindness? Is it because she is proud of your accomplishments and accepting of your faults? Is it because she allows you to be yourself and in her eyes you are beautiful?  Is it because she has seen you when your hair is a mess and you haven’t put on any makeup yet and she still tells you how beautiful you are? Is it because she always reminds you that perfection is overrated?

Have you ever thought about what this world would be like If everyone in this world were perfect?  We would all be exactly the same! That wouldn’t be any fun would it? Do you know that it is the very things that makes you different, that makes you beautiful and her too? Does she remind  you that you are unique in your appearance, in your wisdom, and in your emotions and so is she. These are the things that set you apart, make you irreplaceable. Maybe today you can write five things you like about her and yourself.

Maybe you can start a gratitude journal. telling her how much you appreciate her friendship. Does she remind you that you’re authentic when your body and mind are at ease and that you are beautiful, when you are completely yourself? Do you tell her she is too? On the days that you lose yourself in what the world expects of you does she  reminds you not to conform to what you “should be.” Then do you remember to create your own box and step outside it as you wish. Does she remind you to dance to your own tune?

Some days when  you may feel like shouting from the rooftops, “World, here I am!  Does she remind you that your voice is powerful, significant , and beautiful?  Do you tell her that her’s is too!  Do you know that you deserve to be heard.? You have learned from her to avoid magazines that tell you how you should be and to speak the words that are in your heart and stand up for what you believe in? She reminds you to speak up and be present and to make contributions to what you believe in.

Some days are harder than others and on those rainy days she reminds you to appreciate the sunshine.  Your best friend has helped you to grow stronger,  wiser and when you are feeling ugly her words of encouragement make you feel a bit more beautiful.

Don’t forget to honor your beautiful friends and let them know that your world is a more beautiful place because they are in it. Sometimes your beautiful friend can be your grandmother, mother, step mother, aunt, sister, sister-in-law, niece, a neighbor, co-worker, a childhood friend, teacher, or a mentor. What ever their title is don’t take them for granted and let them know that they are beautiful and so is their friendship.

Fortify Your Life With Friendships

Wise is the person who fortifies their life with friendships. Here’s part of the secret to changing anything in life, be it life, friendships, relationships, concepts, life principles, or work. It all begins with ME, myself, and I! The following was inscribed on the tomb of an Anglican bishop (A.D, 100) among the crypts of Westminster Abbey in London.

When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world. As I grew older and wiser, I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country. But it, too, seemed immovable.

As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it. And now as I lie on my deathbed, I suddenly realized: If I had only changed myself first, then by example I would have changed my family. From their inspiration and encouragement , I would have been able to better my country and, who knows, I may have changed the world. (Anonymous)  

 You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get people interested in you. Dale Carnegie

Mum’s The Word

Mum’s the word if a friend shares something confidential, don’t disclose her secret. No matter how juicy it is! Sometimes in the face of a friends deep pain, there e are no answers that will suffice. Holding a hand, hugging a shoulder, or shedding tears together may be better options. We all want to be better friends. And yet, sometimes the thing we want most of all is someone who can be a good friend to us. 

When we are hurting or struggling, there are certain friends we can count on as sources of great comfort. I’m talking about the friends who have seen you at your worst and at your best. The ones you can tell them anything( and just about have) with full confidence that even the most sordid confession will not cause them to waver in their love for you. They are  also the kind of friends that fall into the category of sincerely being none judgmental and none critical of your shortcomings. They are an example of a safe and loving friend you don’t want to confide in a friend who makes you feel worse after talking to them.

As a general rule, they don’t usually offer pat answers or microwave solutions. Instead, they encourage you, hold you accountable, give you passionate advice that you occasionally follow, and laugh and cry with you. Now you must understand that friends like this are hard to find. And yet it’s worth the effort to cultivate friendships like these. When the name of the game is pain, sometimes we just need someone to talk to. Yet how do you choose that person?

If you don’t have a history with friends you know you can trust, how do you decide with whom you can open up too? How can you be fairly confident that your friend to whom you are baring your very soul will not recoil in horror,  blush with embarrassment,  shake a shamming finger, or give dangerous advice in answers to you dilemma? If you have a friend who has never lets you past her façade of perfection, you might want to think twice before blurting out your deepest and darkest secrets over a cup of coffee at Starbucks.

If a friend is uncomfortable with her own imperfections and struggles, she probably won’t have a clue how to respond appropriately to yours. However is you have a friend who is mutually vulnerable, transparent ,uses good judgement and keeps your secrets to herself then you have a safe place to share your burdens. They are the kind of friend who goes through heartaches and joys, downfalls and triumphs , victories and failures, they’re always there to cheer to you on and cheer you up. You are so blessed to call them friend.

What Does It Mean To Have A Best Friend?

What does it mean to have a best friend? What is really the meaning and purpose of a true friend? Let me share this short story with you and let’s see if we can answer those questions. Dave and Tom had been friends for twenty years. They had reached the prime of their lives. Both were married, had children, owned their own businesses and life had been go to them. For over twenty years hardly a week went by without the two of them,  then their families getting together. Tom had told many people just how blessed he was to have a friend like Dave. He truly loved Tom. Why? Because Tom was the most selfless person he had ever met. He had seen Tom’s selfless lifestyle in action for the last twenty years.

Then one day tragedy struck Tom’s life. His father died in his sleep, totally unexpectedly. Within an hour of his father’s death Tom called Dave, and asked if he would come over. Dave said, ‘I’m on my way.” Tom was on the front lawn of his parent’s house continuing to greet people as they came to comfort the family. All things considered  Tom seemed to be doing very well. He had barely shed a tear. 

Suddenly, he noticed Dave’s SUV driving up and Tom’s eyes began to tear, his heart began to pound. As Dave walked toward the house Tom left the crowd and started to walk toward him. When Tom reached Dave he was sobbing uncontrollable. They embraced and Dave said words of comfort to him. The people in the yard stood in silence as they witnessed what true friendship was all about. One being there for the other.

Wouldn’t you agree with me that they are blessed to have each other.? How many of us can say we have a best friend like this? Unfortunately, not very many. In the hustle and bustle of today’s life we seem to have every little time for friends and relationships. Loyalty is not a priority, but it should be. Slow down, reach out, and start a friendship. Maybe you’ll meet your own Dave or Tom. A quote from John Heywood ” A friend is never known until a man has a need.”

Friends Make Life Much Sweeter

A good friend makes life so much sweeter and brighter during the sunny and rainy days of our lives. When you’re together it doesn’t matter if the skies pour or the winds howl or all of your plans go awry. They have the rare ability to transform disaster into an adventure.

Their friendship gives you courage to be what you want to be. A good friend like them is as rare as seeing a triple rainbow and as precious as rubies and emeralds by the tons, that cannot be measured. They will even say the right thing when you fall off your diet and into a hot fudge sundae. “Whipped cream doesn’t have any carbohydrates.”

They don’t mind your wrinkles much; because they came courtesy of the many years the two of you spent laughing together and they think you are pretty cool even when you are acting like the biggest nerd on earth. They are really the cool ones because they have the hear to spare your feelings.

Knowing they are always behind you is often your best reason for moving forward. Their friendship is the super-strength glue; The two of you have an impenetrable bond and are sticking together for life! Their friendship isn’t a gift you hold in your hands but a blessing you carry in your heart.

You Are My Friend Forever

Goodbye can be the saddest word we ever hear, and often it is not the word we are ready for, but in those times it’s the comforting words of friends that can make a difference.

A comforting friend will remind you that you were taught that everything has a season and summer must go to make room for autumn and winter, there is always a spring. Somehow those words don’t seem to be enough during a time when we are saying our goodbyes and letting go. They are meant to comfort, to console, but often can leave us feeling hollow for a while.

The real comfort comes in knowing that your friends cared, invested in you and love you. The void is something no one can deny or fill, but in grief you can feel the magnitude of the love of comforting friends.

Though your loss may have seem heavy realize that your friends love and concern for you is a great blessing and when your burden lightens that there will places in your heart that can only be filled with memories. 

And there are places in your soul that can only be healed by the gentle love of God and time. May you find comfort knowing so many thoughts are with you during your difficult time. May you find peace knowing that you have friends who care about you and are praying for you.

Hold fast to your memories, all the cherished moments of the past, the blessings and laughter. The joy and celebrations, the sorrow and tears they all add up to a treasure of fond yesterdays you shared and spent together, they keep the one you loved close to you in spirit and thought.

The special moments and memories in your life will never change they will always be in your heart, today and forevermore. your truly comforting friends know the best and must beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard but must be felt with your heart.

Life Is So Much Better With Great Friends

Great friends are hard to find and harder to hang on to, and hardest still to let go of. That’s why you should always remember to hold on to our great friends for dear life and tell them how much you treasure them.

A Great friend is a special kind of friend who knows exactly when to be honest with you and when it’s best to wait because after all they have mastered the art of timing that’s one of the qualities that make them so special. Then there are those well-meaning friends who tell you what we want to hear but a great friend tells you what we need to hear.

A Great friend is someone who is honest enough to warn you when you are about to make a big mistake and kind enough not to tease you when you make it anyway. They will helps you to see your most embarrassing moments as material for a comedy routine instead of being dramatizing incidents that make you feel like you need years of self-reflection. Great friends have a way of  understanding you when you have a problem and you don’t want a solution, advice, or even sympathy . . . you just need someone to listen. Great friends master the art of listening.

A Great friend will gently and tactfully suggest that you look at something another way when all of your plans go awry they have a rare ability to transform a disaster into an adventure. Their friendship gives you the courage to be what you want to be. True friends are as rare as triple rainbows and as precious as rubies and emeralds by the ton. They are a treasure that cannot be measured .

A Great Friend will guide you through your darkest days and longest nights counting the reasons you appreciate them is like counting leaves on a tree . . . you will lose your place long before you finish. Without them your life would be half empty, with them you feel happy, whole, and complete.

A Great Friend can be your Mother, Grandmother, Auntie, Sister, Brother, Spouse, Old Friend, New Friend, Teacher, Neighbor, A Childhood Friend, A Mentor, and so on  . . . but the one thing that remains true is that your prized possession in all the world is nothing that can be held or shown  . . . it is the friendship that over the years the two of you have nurtured and grown.  

~Miss Carol Jo ~